Above and in front two birds are darting in and out of a tree. Sometimes they collide to fight or maybe mate, but I can't really make it out in the low light. It's just after
dusk
, I have nothing to do, I'm watching them, trying to figure it out.Windrush Art Kid Oligarch
Wed, 11 Nov 2025 21:12:41
Tue, 02 Dec 2025 11:29:50
After thinking and forgetting and thinking and forgetting
I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.
something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever
Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17
She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.
with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.
the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.
Thank you for telling me that I'm failing to see how I'm reproducing the dynamics I'm trying to critique by only describing my Korean colleague / fresh meat and the black girl in relation to others and myself.
i know a little bit of lacan which probably influences me in a way i cant articulate
But seriously, thank you, Jack
i really havent
They're fucking around with the box. I ask her what people do with fireworks for so long before they're ready to light. She doesn't know.
okay this is interesting because pedagogies we have rn are not proper models
i love it here