not their contents

and the fake qualifier

ahnaf is it worth reading all those books

we need to be deconstructing our identities

It Will Get Lighter

i know a little bit of lacan which probably influences me in a way i cant articulate

magnetises a pin

Thank you, Jack

They're fucking around with the box. I ask her what people do with fireworks for so long before they're ready to light. She doesn't know.

much more tactility

i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything

thank you

I've found the girl, or she's found me, and we're smoking a cigarette while we watch the silhouettes of the French Raj and his fireworks bearer down on the bank.

have you read

this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet

We stand there laughing. The fireworks go off behind him.

you cannot feed someone language, they have to speak

Maybe, Jack, I'm doing this because I'm English?

I am below everything.

Thank you for telling me that I'm failing to see how I'm reproducing the dynamics I'm trying to critique by only describing my Korean colleague / fresh meat and the black girl in relation to others and myself.

i hadn't considered this pedagogically or as a kind of personal knowledge management system (puke) at all but i suppose it is both of those things

but really the thing should be autonomous

ahnaf abrar

1. Lift and confinement – The crowded, immovable lift represents feeling trapped or constrained in real life, either by social expectations, relationships, or internal emotions. The inability to speak in front of others suggests suppressed feelings or fear of judgment.
2. Unexpected confession – The girl saying “I think I might love you” could symbolize longing for connection or recognition. It may reflect unacknowledged desires, vulnerability, or anxiety about intimacy.
3. Forest and snow – The transition to a snowy forest signals escape into the subconscious, a place of solitude, reflection, and emotional processing. Snow often represents purity, stillness, or emotional coldness, while dusk points to transition or uncertainty.
4. The fox – Foxes are traditionally symbols of cunning, intuition, and guidance, but here it’s more ethereal: its bites are gentle yet noticeable, suggesting a confrontation with subtle truths, small regrets, or lessons that must be acknowledged. The unspoken apology indicates things left unresolved or feelings that cannot be expressed.
5. Death or dissolution – Dying in the dream often doesn’t mean literal death; it represents transformation, the end of a phase, or surrendering control. It can indicate letting go of fear, old habits, or emotional blockages.

Can I see

a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it

that looks like my instagram account