The old failed actor genuinely believed this girl was of a lesser race. He believed she shouldn't be talking with me, shouldn't be here at this party, shouldn't be here in this country. He wanted a white England. I didn't really challenge him on it. Sometimes I justify it with thoughts like I was drunk, or baffled, or it isn't an argument I'll win, or he can't hear me anyway, or whatever. I didn't argue with him. I just cut off his rant and left with a pathetic "In a bit."
brb i will read and reply sincerely
Tue, 02 Dec 2025 11:29:50
i got bored though because i knew all of the different arrangements of it. i probably needed to stick at it longer to get it dense enough to feel navigable in a way that was engaging to me
but really the thing should be autonomous
it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful
something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever
"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."
a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it
the textwall is as much for me as it is for you
i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything
somewhere between instagram and chatgpt
currently
One of the birds shoots out of the tree.
Today I felt like starting
I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.
Sun, 02 Nov 2025 22:11:24
mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation
it is hopeful