i know a little bit of lacan which probably influences me in a way i cant articulate

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

there is a distinction between western-modern pedagogical systems that's like text-based as in a legal method but there is an idea of "pathshala" or "guru shissho"/ "porompora" i mean how masters relayed knowledge to the student by (oral) transmission often by memorising books. so what was taught was always interactive. knowledge was interactive, you spoke with people rather than read texts.

like people can read 100 books and still not have the fire within them

so the method has to be autonomous

i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything

there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.

a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it

but it is in my head and am i compelled to realise it, so it is my silmarillion, my tempelos

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 23:49:08

Tue, 02 Dec 2025 11:29:50

It Will Get Lighter

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:27:13

Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17

Lift Analysis

Thu, 04 Dec 2025 11:31:03

Can I see

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 21:54:03

I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.

13, H, grate

brb i will read and reply sincerely

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Garden Post-Dusk, Birds Above, In Another Life

Rain, starting

in a way what we are really interested in with pedagogy is the magnetisation

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

IWGD