with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.

i know a little bit of lacan which probably influences me in a way i cant articulate

lol yea

whats your name?

division of reality is straying away from it

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

in a post. I want to be remembered

no i haven't really read anything

Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.

It Will Get Lighter

like first name

hiding from the rain

...

really i want the internet

Imprint, memory, impact, representation, impression

2 (actually index). two is company

We gather around the start of a causeway down to the Thames. It's a pretty cold night and there's a breeze coming off the river.

I've found the girl, or she's found me, and we're smoking a cigarette while we watch the silhouettes of the French Raj and his fireworks bearer down on the bank.

He went in there with a camera to film it before he moved out of the building. He didn't think anyone would believe the story if he didn't have proof.

I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.

somewhere between instagram and chatgpt

We look out over the river to a block of luxury flats built on the site of some old docks. It would be nice to live right there. Yes.

They're fucking around with the box. I ask her what people do with fireworks for so long before they're ready to light. She doesn't know.

  1. Lift and confinement – The crowded, immovable lift represents feeling trapped or constrained in real life, either by social expectations, relationships, or internal emotions. The inability to speak in front of others suggests suppressed feelings or fear of judgment.
  2. Unexpected confession – The girl saying “I think I might love you” could symbolize longing for connection or recognition. It may reflect unacknowledged desires, vulnerability, or anxiety about intimacy.
  3. Forest and snow – The transition to a snowy forest signals escape into the subconscious, a place of solitude, reflection, and emotional processing. Snow often represents purity, stillness, or emotional coldness, while dusk points to transition or uncertainty.
  4. The fox – Foxes are traditionally symbols of cunning, intuition, and guidance, but here it’s more ethereal: its bites are gentle yet noticeable, suggesting a confrontation with subtle truths, small regrets, or lessons that must be acknowledged. The unspoken apology indicates things left unresolved or feelings that cannot be expressed.
  5. Death or dissolution – Dying in the dream often doesn’t mean literal death; it represents transformation, the end of a phase, or surrendering control. It can indicate letting go of fear, old habits, or emotional blockages.

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 22:11:24

Dreams like these are highly symbolic and emotionally intense. Here’s a breakdown of common interpretations:

She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.

currently