there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.

She closes the window. I wasn't paying attention anyway, I'm getting cold, and the birds are nowhere to be seen. I go inside.

Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?


It Will Get Lighter

Thu, 04 Dec 2025 11:31:03

I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.

something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever

Rain, starting

After thinking and forgetting and thinking and forgetting

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46

in a post. I want to be remembered

Better Lift

Tue, 02 Dec 2025 11:29:50

I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.

Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 21:22:59

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:27:13

Today I felt like starting

        13       |
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            H   |
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. . . .         |
. . . .         |
. . . .         |
. . . .         |
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i am quite confused, not quite getting the idea of it

wow, you are the first stranger to write a textwall to me

a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it