I wonder if the birds knew I was watching?
ion
We look out over the river to a block of luxury flats built on the site of some old docks. It would be nice to live right there. Yes.
She closes the window. I wasn't paying attention anyway, I'm getting cold, and the birds are nowhere to be seen. I go inside.
We gather around the start of a causeway down to the Thames. It's a pretty cold night and there's a breeze coming off the river.
"I'm only attracted to you", he replies. "Like, you only."
She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.
Mon, 01 Dec 2025 23:38:15
We stand there laughing. The fireworks go off behind him.
"Put a blanket."
Wed, 11 Nov 2025 21:12:41
"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."
its performative
i dont understand magnetisation
I've found the girl, or she's found me, and we're smoking a cigarette while we watch the silhouettes of the French Raj and his fireworks bearer down on the bank.
something religious, a kind of complex,
it will get lighter
, something washing, cleansing, revealing, etc.so an active mazelike process
I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.
magnetisation/form
There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.