I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.
I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.
i got bored though because i knew all of the different arrangements of it. i probably needed to stick at it longer to get it dense enough to feel navigable in a way that was engaging to me
One of the birds shoots out of the tree.
The bird dives back into the tree. It shakes, some leaves fall.
so i or you can author smaller fragments that get arranged
"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."
with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.
There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.
that is unstable and lets me operate in that discovery mode that i can create within and also produce works from.
Hours staring at the ceiling, the wall, curling up into a ball. It seems annoyed with the light, it kind of recoils. It will get lighter. I wonder where it goes in the day.
abrar?
i want to do that too
yeah people dont get it they assume its ahnaf
so at the end
much more tactility
so an active mazelike process
think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now
a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it
the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.