what do you mean

hiding from the rain

magnetisation/form

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

to work in time to get to the timeless, perfection thru chaos

much more tactility

think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now

i know a little bit of lacan which probably influences me in a way i cant articulate

so an active mazelike process

there is a distinction between western-modern pedagogical systems that's like text-based as in a legal method but there is an idea of "pathshala" or "guru shissho"/ "porompora" i mean how masters relayed knowledge to the student by (oral) transmission often by memorising books. so what was taught was always interactive. knowledge was interactive, you spoke with people rather than read texts.

thank you

so the method has to be autonomous

mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation

no longer writing in the third person

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:38:49

okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate

After thinking and forgetting and thinking and forgetting

Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?

and the fake qualifier

        13       |
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            H   |
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. . . .         |
. . . .         |
. . . .         |
. . . .         |
                |

She closes the window. I wasn't paying attention anyway, I'm getting cold, and the birds are nowhere to be seen. I go inside.