nope. i only remember the leaves bristling behind the window during chemistry class


the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.

in a post. I want to be remembered

i believe search always should be immersive, because whatever is pre planned and non consuming (what you are looking for is total engulfment by the spectre of the real), a joyous intensity, a flow of virtue

a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it

the textwall is as much for me as it is for you

Lift Analysis

wow, you are the first stranger to write a textwall to me

It Will Get Lighter

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 22:11:24

but it is in my head and am i compelled to realise it, so it is my silmarillion, my tempelos

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

Rain, starting

it is hopeful

Better Lift

I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.



There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.