We gather around the start of a causeway down to the Thames. It's a pretty cold night and there's a breeze coming off the river. I've found the girl, or she's found me, and we're smoking a cigarette while we watch the dim silhouettes of the French Raj and his fireworks bearer down on the bank. They're fucking around with the box. I ask her what people do with fireworks for so long before they're ready to light. She doesn't know.
"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."
Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?
Sun, 02 Nov 2025 23:49:08
Windrush Art Kid Oligarch
you have a beautiful account btw
Above and in front two birds are darting in and out of a tree. Sometimes they collide to fight or maybe mate, but I can't really make it out in the low light. It's just after
dusk
, I have nothing to do, I'm watching them, trying to figure it out."I'm only attracted to you", he replies. "Like, you only."
i believe search always should be immersive, because whatever is pre planned and non consuming (what you are looking for is total engulfment by the spectre of the real), a joyous intensity, a flow of virtue
we can only engage in such a way
autonomy of learning
a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it
The bird dives back into the tree. It shakes, some leaves fall.
there is a distinction between western-modern pedagogical systems that's like text-based as in a legal method but there is an idea of "pathshala" or "guru shissho"/ "porompora" i mean how masters relayed knowledge to the student by (oral) transmission often by memorising books. so what was taught was always interactive. knowledge was interactive, you spoke with people rather than read texts.
but really the thing should be autonomous
i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything
no i haven't really read anything
to work in time to get to the timeless, perfection thru chaos
in a way what we are really interested in with pedagogy is the magnetisation
abrar?
that looks like my instagram account
barren land
no like which do people call me
i sat down to eat my peasant dinner but i thought it was a song you sent so i didn’t watch it then
i want to do that too
its good