Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46
a version of this existed for a few months last year but it was static. it was HTML with writing and pictures and videos and sounds. i had this feeling that the code should be as important as the content, that structurally each piece in relation to each other piece shouldn't change, that the mazelike quality should emerge from me intricately arranging paths through it. like classic hypertext
not their contents
i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything
i got bored though because i knew all of the different arrangements of it. i probably needed to stick at it longer to get it dense enough to feel navigable in a way that was engaging to me
"Put a blanket."
the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.
so the method has to be autonomous
okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate
all that is to say
we can only engage in such a way
mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation
i know a little bit of lacan which probably influences me in a way i cant articulate
to work in time to get to the timeless, perfection thru chaos
but really the thing should be autonomous
I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.
division of reality is straying away from it
something religious, a kind of complex,
it will get lighter
, something washing, cleansing, revealing, etc.Wed, 11 Nov 2025 21:12:41
kind of mythopoesis
The slug lives in my bathroom. I only see it in the early hours of the morning, when I'm not quite right.
it is hopeful