"I'm only attracted to you", he replies. "Like, you only."

1

a heavy, heavy rain. a clear day.

I created this site

you cannot feed someone truth

to work in time to get to the timeless, perfection thru chaos

so an active mazelike process

i am quite illiterate on producing technology

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

Garden Post-Dusk, Birds Above, In Another Life

something religious, a kind of complex,

it will get lighter

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:38:49

I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.

my watchlater reached its limit years ago and now i have to create a playlist for each new topic im interested in but it is incredibly hard to create the taxonomy of knowledge because everything seems to be everything else because at the end it is what you get from it that matters not what is given

really i want the internet

wow, you are the first stranger to write a textwall to me

but it is in my head and am i compelled to realise it, so it is my silmarillion, my tempelos

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 22:11:24

like people can read 100 books and still not have the fire within them

division of reality is straying away from it

you have a beautiful account btw

"No, it'll get cold!"
"Put a tut ahh put a-"

This is a website run by a narcissist who can't produce anything without the hope that it is seen and loved but can't act due to the fear of it being seen and hated. They immediately feel the need to ask Jack GPT to define whatever this feeling is in the hope that understanding it will mean control over it and control over it will mean that they can stop it.

all that is to say

there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.

brb i will read and reply sincerely

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

somewhere between instagram and chatgpt

I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.

Rain, starting

Above and in front two birds are darting in and out of a tree. Sometimes they collide to fight or maybe mate, but I can't really make it out in the low light. It's just after

dusk

we can only engage in such a way

kind of mythopoesis

i got bored though because i knew all of the different arrangements of it. i probably needed to stick at it longer to get it dense enough to feel navigable in a way that was engaging to me