was it worth it

a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

We stand there laughing. The fireworks go off behind him.

1. Lift and confinement – The crowded, immovable lift represents feeling trapped or constrained in real life, either by social expectations, relationships, or internal emotions. The inability to speak in front of others suggests suppressed feelings or fear of judgment.
2. Unexpected confession – The girl saying “I think I might love you” could symbolize longing for connection or recognition. It may reflect unacknowledged desires, vulnerability, or anxiety about intimacy.
3. Forest and snow – The transition to a snowy forest signals escape into the subconscious, a place of solitude, reflection, and emotional processing. Snow often represents purity, stillness, or emotional coldness, while dusk points to transition or uncertainty.
4. The fox – Foxes are traditionally symbols of cunning, intuition, and guidance, but here it’s more ethereal: its bites are gentle yet noticeable, suggesting a confrontation with subtle truths, small regrets, or lessons that must be acknowledged. The unspoken apology indicates things left unresolved or feelings that cannot be expressed.
5. Death or dissolution – Dying in the dream often doesn’t mean literal death; it represents transformation, the end of a phase, or surrendering control. It can indicate letting go of fear, old habits, or emotional blockages.

It's

dusk

They're fucking around with the box. I ask her what people do with fireworks for so long before they're ready to light. She doesn't know.

We look out over the river to a block of luxury flats built on the site of some old docks. It would be nice to live right there. Yes.

It Will Get Lighter

kind of mythopoesis

I've found the girl, or she's found me, and we're smoking a cigarette while we watch the silhouettes of the French Raj and his fireworks bearer down on the bank.

Thank you, Jack

He went in there with a camera to film it before he moved out of the building. He didn't think anyone would believe the story if he didn't have proof.

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:38:49

the site i am dreaming

Better Lift

Lift Analysis

We gather around the start of a causeway down to the Thames. It's a pretty cold night and there's a breeze coming off the river.

in a post. I want to be remembered

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.