i am quite confused, not quite getting the idea of it

autonomy of learning

Windrush Art Kid Oligarch

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:38:49

with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.

that is unstable and lets me operate in that discovery mode that i can create within and also produce works from.

a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it

This is a website run by a narcissist who can't produce anything without the hope that it is seen and loved but can't act due to the fear of it being seen and hated. They immediately feel the need to ask Jack GPT to define whatever this feeling is in the hope that understanding it will mean control over it and control over it will mean that they can stop it.

Picture

i believe search always should be immersive, because whatever is pre planned and non consuming (what you are looking for is total engulfment by the spectre of the real), a joyous intensity, a flow of virtue

It Will Get Lighter

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.

no longer writing in the third person

something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever

mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation

It's

dusk

in a snowy forest and I'm playing with a fox.
It bites my wrist but there is only a dull ache.
I feel that it wants to say sorry but can't. I die.

Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17

The only real Londoner remaining is old, bitter, kept around for entertainment, defined by tropes from 30+ years ago. They play gangsters in films, or they work in a pie and mash shop, or they go on Business Insider's YouTube channel to tell you about their crimes. And they somehow still find the time to spend all day hanging about cafes and pubs for you to bump into, to remind you of Real London.

Mon, 01 Dec 2025 23:38:15

all that is to say

as in

A roll of 50s is one of the items he dumps onto my table during the search. Of course it is. He asks if I'm a delivery boy or a setter or this or that diamond related job. I keep saying no, I'm enjoying hearing all of these new words. Eventually I tell him that I work in film, which is kind of true. He asks where I'm filming. I'm not filming. He tells me that I can't be that good at it then. He then tells me that he made a film once, in the 80s. It was called Pimlico Rats.