it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

that is unstable and lets me operate in that discovery mode that i can create within and also produce works from.

but it is in my head and am i compelled to realise it, so it is my silmarillion, my tempelos

the textwall is as much for me as it is for you

i am quite illiterate on producing technology

theres a kind of a cowardice to generative art that i want to avoid though. i want the kind of relationship to this thing that a game designer has to a game engine

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

wow, you are the first stranger to write a textwall to me

Today I felt like starting

yeah people dont get it they assume its ahnaf

as in

this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet

i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything

its good short few pages

propensity within someone

Better Lift

kind of mythopoesis

much more tactility

autonomy of learning

its good

with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.

yeah

Picture

i see a website

god being the centre magnet

division of reality is straying away from it