i really havent

"Put a blanket."

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

It's

dusk

in a snowy forest and I'm playing with a fox.
It bites my wrist but there is only a dull ache.
I feel that it wants to say sorry but can't. I die.

Rain, starting

I am below everything.

Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17

One of the birds shoots out of the tree.

Garden Post-Dusk, Birds Above, In Another Life

Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.

Style

no longer writing in the third person

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

Lift Analysis

that is unstable and lets me operate in that discovery mode that i can create within and also produce works from.

a heavy, heavy rain. a clear day. I created this site.

really i want the internet

the textwall is as much for me as it is for you

Worse Lift