Rain, starting

i understand

to work in time to get to the timeless, perfection thru chaos

there is a distinction between western-modern pedagogical systems that's like text-based as in a legal method but there is an idea of "pathshala" or "guru shissho"/ "porompora" i mean how masters relayed knowledge to the student by (oral) transmission often by memorising books. so what was taught was always interactive. knowledge was interactive, you spoke with people rather than read texts.

in a way what we are really interested in with pedagogy is the magnetisation

my watchlater reached its limit years ago and now i have to create a playlist for each new topic im interested in but it is incredibly hard to create the taxonomy of knowledge because everything seems to be everything else because at the end it is what you get from it that matters not what is given

as in

whats your name?

its performative

i know a little bit of lacan which probably influences me in a way i cant articulate

ahnaf abrar

so an active mazelike process

that looks like my instagram account

is this you as well

so the method has to be autonomous

ahnaf is it worth reading all those books

you cannot feed someone truth

think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now

i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything

Thank you, Jack

we can only engage in such a way

i haven't read 100 book s so i'm probably not getting the depth of all of what you're saying

i sat down to eat my peasant dinner but i thought it was a song you sent so i didn’t watch it then

Overall meaning: The dream seems to explore vulnerability, unspoken emotion, and the tension between connection and isolation. It suggests you may be processing intense feelings of longing or missed opportunities, and your subconscious is guiding you to acknowledge, release, or transform them.

hello reader,



Worse Lift

  1. Lift and confinement – The crowded, immovable lift represents feeling trapped or constrained in real life, either by social expectations, relationships, or internal emotions. The inability to speak in front of others suggests suppressed feelings or fear of judgment.
  2. Unexpected confession – The girl saying “I think I might love you” could symbolize longing for connection or recognition. It may reflect unacknowledged desires, vulnerability, or anxiety about intimacy.
  3. Forest and snow – The transition to a snowy forest signals escape into the subconscious, a place of solitude, reflection, and emotional processing. Snow often represents purity, stillness, or emotional coldness, while dusk points to transition or uncertainty.
  4. The fox – Foxes are traditionally symbols of cunning, intuition, and guidance, but here it’s more ethereal: its bites are gentle yet noticeable, suggesting a confrontation with subtle truths, small regrets, or lessons that must be acknowledged. The unspoken apology indicates things left unresolved or feelings that cannot be expressed.
  5. Death or dissolution – Dying in the dream often doesn’t mean literal death; it represents transformation, the end of a phase, or surrendering control. It can indicate letting go of fear, old habits, or emotional blockages.

mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation