Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46

in a post. I want to be remembered

its performative

okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate

kind of mythopoesis

Style

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

Wed, 11 Nov 2025 21:12:41

something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever

One of the birds shoots out of the tree.

wow, you are the first stranger to write a textwall to me

really i want the internet

the textwall is as much for me as it is for you

Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.

think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now

so at the end

so an active mazelike process

"Put a blanket."

I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.

yeah people dont get it they assume its ahnaf

2 (actually index). two is company

Lift Analysis

I imagine that some lab-grown 29-year-old from Woking with a mind honed to identify individuals who fit the profile of Real Londoner (as conceived of by 50 opinion-polled racist builders and their wives in the Midlands) picks a stubborn local who can still somehow afford to live here and passes him along to some creative studio.

Garden Post-Dusk, Birds Above, In Another Life

  1. Lift and confinement – The crowded, immovable lift represents feeling trapped or constrained in real life, either by social expectations, relationships, or internal emotions. The inability to speak in front of others suggests suppressed feelings or fear of judgment.
  2. Unexpected confession – The girl saying “I think I might love you” could symbolize longing for connection or recognition. It may reflect unacknowledged desires, vulnerability, or anxiety about intimacy.
  3. Forest and snow – The transition to a snowy forest signals escape into the subconscious, a place of solitude, reflection, and emotional processing. Snow often represents purity, stillness, or emotional coldness, while dusk points to transition or uncertainty.
  4. The fox – Foxes are traditionally symbols of cunning, intuition, and guidance, but here it’s more ethereal: its bites are gentle yet noticeable, suggesting a confrontation with subtle truths, small regrets, or lessons that must be acknowledged. The unspoken apology indicates things left unresolved or feelings that cannot be expressed.
  5. Death or dissolution – Dying in the dream often doesn’t mean literal death; it represents transformation, the end of a phase, or surrendering control. It can indicate letting go of fear, old habits, or emotional blockages.

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"No, it'll get cold!"
"Put a tut ahh put a-"