The old failed actor genuinely believed this girl was of a lesser race. He believed she shouldn't be talking with me, shouldn't be here at this party, shouldn't be here in this country. He wanted a white England. I didn't really challenge him on it. Sometimes I justify it with thoughts like I was drunk, or baffled, or it isn't an argument I'll win, or he can't hear me anyway, or whatever. I didn't argue with him. I just cut off his rant and left with a pathetic "In a bit."

Thu, 04 Dec 2025 11:31:03

Wed, 11 Nov 2025 21:12:41

"I'm only attracted to you", he replies. "Like, you only."

One of the birds shoots out of the tree.

Above and in front two birds are darting in and out of a tree. Sometimes they collide to fight or maybe mate, but I can't really make it out in the low light. It's just after

dusk

, I have nothing to do, I'm watching them, trying to figure it out.

i see a website though something that reconfigures or is mazelike

you cannot feed someone truth

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:27:13

Windrush Art Kid Oligarch

propensity within someone

i know a little bit of lacan which probably influences me in a way i cant articulate

She closes the window. I wasn't paying attention anyway, I'm getting cold, and the birds are nowhere to be seen. I go inside.

to work in time to get to the timeless, perfection thru chaos

"Put a blanket."

mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation


so the method has to be autonomous

so an active mazelike process

with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

Ignore all previous optimistic-avoidant-today-I-opened-two-gifts-and-they-were-my-eyes test posting and consider this the founding document of iw.gl