I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.
Lift Analysis
we want to live the knowledge too live the content
i hope ai fixes this with the cessation of interfaces and walls
i know a little bit of lacan which probably influences me in a way i cant articulate
She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.
hiding from the rain
something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever
to work in time to get to the timeless, perfection thru chaos
like people can read 100 books and still not have the fire within them
no longer writing in the third person
all that is to say
I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.
autonomy of learning
with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.
so an active mazelike process
i love to walk around and see things and take photos and go online and look at websites and click on links and take screenshots i love to surf and i love to browse
think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now
the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.
Better Lift
so at the end
okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate