it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

it is hopeful

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

nope. i only remember the leaves bristling behind the window during chemistry class

wow, you are the first stranger to write a textwall to me


It's

dusk

in a snowy forest and I'm playing with a fox.
It bites my wrist but there is only a dull ache.
I feel that it wants to say sorry but can't. I die.

that is unstable and lets me operate in that discovery mode that i can create within and also produce works from.

propensity within someone

to work in time to get to the timeless, perfection thru chaos

mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation

autonomy of learning

much more tactility

i know a little bit of lacan which probably influences me in a way i cant articulate

amazing hopefully this was all legible and frankly i might be going very off board but you seemed interesting

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46

...

confused - is it the tide or its absense? I still like where I was going with it. anyway, real reader know this site is the note.
Above and in front two birds are darting in and out of a tree. Sometimes they collide to fight or maybe mate, but I can't really make it out in the low light. It's just after dusk, I have nothing to do, I'm watching them, trying to figure it out.

magnetisation/form