The bird dives back into the tree. It shakes, some leaves fall.

Thank you, Jack

i did until you asked which kind of gave it away

and the fake qualifier

we need to be deconstructing our identities

i was tempted to lie about my name

barren land

Lift Analysis

Actual born-Londoners aren't LARPing like this, they sold their shite family home for a million pounds and moved to Malaga years ago. They have their culture and they've taken it elsewhere.

a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it

autonomy of learning

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 22:11:24

in a post. I want to be remembered

Thank you, Jack

He was a proper old-fashioned London geezer (cringe word, hate it, can't think of a better one, worst of all it's the correct word), kind of East Endy, kind of Real London, the kind you don't really meet but if you do it always feels like an uncanny immersive theatre experience. They're anachronistic. They only belong in the London collectively imagined by people who don't spend any time in it.

with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.

brb i will read and reply sincerely

It's loud and he's gone deaf in one ear, so I don't think he's really hearing anything I'm trying to say. We're both pretty drunk too. It's making for a kind of surreal interactive Business Insider YouTube video of a conversation. He talks, waits for my response, sees my mouth moving but doesn't hear my words, then he imagines something in their place, and replies to that. At least I don't really have to do anything but drink and mime and listen to a lot of bullshit fake gangster talk, being an actor, boxing, the old days, blah blah blah.

but it is in my head and am i compelled to realise it, so it is my silmarillion, my tempelos

but really the thing should be autonomous

He was cast as the guy who gets picked up and thrown out of the poker game to set the scene before the main characters arrive. Out of Real London and into real London, a discarded prop, at this party, chatting to me.

there is a distinction between western-modern pedagogical systems that's like text-based as in a legal method but there is an idea of "pathshala" or "guru shissho"/ "porompora" i mean how masters relayed knowledge to the student by (oral) transmission often by memorising books. so what was taught was always interactive. knowledge was interactive, you spoke with people rather than read texts.

part of an old note. It will get lighter.

Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17

Today I felt like starting

Pimlico Rats