Thu, 06 Nov 2025 21:22:59
no longer writing in the third person
so at the end
the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.
She closes the window. I wasn't paying attention anyway, I'm getting cold, and the birds are nowhere to be seen. I go inside.
I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.
Better Lift
Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46
hiding from the rain
There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.
December 2025
send link
She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.
Sun, 02 Nov 2025 21:54:03
...
barren land
wait what is that
bro i read nothing in my life
think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now
division of reality is straying away from it
ahnaf is it worth reading all those books