the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

It Will Get Lighter

I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 21:22:59

It Will Get Lighter

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 22:11:24

FOUNDING DOCUMENT

Mon, 01 Dec 2025 23:38:15

Better Lift

yeah

yeah

She closes the window. I wasn't paying attention anyway, I'm getting cold, and the birds are nowhere to be seen. I go inside.

We look out over the river to a block of luxury flats built on the site of some old docks. It would be nice to live right there. Yes.

Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

We stand there laughing. The fireworks go off behind him.

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46

no longer writing in the third person

something religious, a kind of complex,

it will get lighter

, something washing, cleansing, revealing, etc.

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division of reality is straying away from it