i am quite illiterate on producing technology

Thu, 04 Dec 2025 11:31:03

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:38:49

Style

Above and in front two birds are darting in and out of a tree. Sometimes they collide to fight or maybe mate, but I can't really make it out in the low light. It's just after

dusk

, I have nothing to do, I'm watching them, trying to figure it out.

It Will Get Lighter

Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?



Wed, 11 Nov 2025 21:12:41

there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.

"Put a blanket."
"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."

so the method has to be autonomous

like people can read 100 books and still not have the fire within them

        13       |
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autonomy of learning

okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate

It's

dusk

in a snowy forest and I'm playing with a fox.
It bites my wrist but there is only a dull ache.
I feel that it wants to say sorry but can't. I die.

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 22:11:24

I am below everything.

One of the birds shoots out of the tree.

hiding from the rain

there is a distinction between western-modern pedagogical systems that's like text-based as in a legal method but there is an idea of "pathshala" or "guru shissho"/ "porompora" i mean how masters relayed knowledge to the student by (oral) transmission often by memorising books. so what was taught was always interactive. knowledge was interactive, you spoke with people rather than read texts.

It Will Get Lighter

December 2025

i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything

Imprint, memory, impact, representation, impression