the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.
"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."
yes
but it is in my head and am i compelled to realise it, so it is my silmarillion, my tempelos
god being the centre magnet
mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation
They're fucking around with the box. I ask her what people do with fireworks for so long before they're ready to light. She doesn't know.
hiding from the rain
think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now
to work in time to get to the timeless, perfection thru chaos
Thank you, Jack
Today I felt like starting
so an active mazelike process
idk
with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.