but it is in my head and am i compelled to realise it, so it is my silmarillion, my tempelos

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

so i or you can author smaller fragments that get arranged

kind of mythopoesis

i got bored though because i knew all of the different arrangements of it. i probably needed to stick at it longer to get it dense enough to feel navigable in a way that was engaging to me

currently

I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.

something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever

"Put a blanket."

Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17


theres a kind of a cowardice to generative art that i want to avoid though. i want the kind of relationship to this thing that a game designer has to a game engine

She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.

Better Lift

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

Rain, starting

Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.

I am below everything.

hiding from the rain