As we're stood there I notice a middle-aged woman staring at us across the room. I'm trying to catch her gaze, but its kind of vacant. I guess she sees me looking and considers it to be an invitation. She floats over to us in this strange dazed way, and on the approach I realise she's staring at (through?) my Korean colleague / fresh meat. She's saying wow, wow, wow. She seems genuinely so delighted, so shocked, so elated.

we can only engage in such a way

autonomy of learning

Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17

it is hopeful

something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever

so the method has to be autonomous

Imprint, memory, impact, representation, impression

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 22:11:24

to work in time to get to the timeless, perfection thru chaos

all that is to say

brb i will read and reply sincerely

propensity within someone

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:38:49

I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.

Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?

Worse Lift

a version of this existed for a few months last year but it was static. it was HTML with writing and pictures and videos and sounds. i had this feeling that the code should be as important as the content, that structurally each piece in relation to each other piece shouldn't change, that the mazelike quality should emerge from me intricately arranging paths through it. like classic hypertext

Rain, starting

currently

somewhere between instagram and chatgpt

a heavy, heavy rain. a clear day.

I created this site

.

I am below everything.

but it is in my head and am i compelled to realise it, so it is my silmarillion, my tempelos



There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

so an active mazelike process

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 21:54:03

mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation

I wonder if the birds knew I was watching?