As I'm trying to tell my Korean colleague / fresh meat that this is abnormal, that most people in England aren't like this, the host of the party emerges from the bathroom to a roar of laughter and applause. He's a fat middle aged Frenchman and he's changed into traditional Indian dress and a turban. He looks fucking ridiculous. I try to back away, to avoid the inevitable photo of me in this moment that will one day appear to ruin my life, but everyone is crowding around, trapping me in the middle of it.

division of reality is straying away from it

this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet

brb i will read and reply sincerely

somewhere between instagram and chatgpt

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

not their contents

that is unstable and lets me operate in that discovery mode that i can create within and also produce works from.

the textwall is as much for me as it is for you

but i respect your search

but really the thing should be autonomous

Better Lift

magnetisation/form

okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate

but it is in my head and am i compelled to realise it, so it is my silmarillion, my tempelos

to work in time to get to the timeless, perfection thru chaos

i got bored though because i knew all of the different arrangements of it. i probably needed to stick at it longer to get it dense enough to feel navigable in a way that was engaging to me

She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.

I am below everything.

Above and in front two birds are darting in and out of a tree. Sometimes they collide to fight or maybe mate, but I can't really make it out in the low light. It's just after

dusk

, I have nothing to do, I'm watching them, trying to figure it out.

like people can read 100 books and still not have the fire within them

in a way what we are really interested in with pedagogy is the magnetisation

I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.

there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:38:49

Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17

FOUNDING DOCUMENT