There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

Style

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

currently

13, H, grate


it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful


Tue, 02 Dec 2025 11:29:50


She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.

Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.

"No, it'll get cold!"
"Put a tut ahh put a-"

this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet

have you read

fw

nope. i only remember the leaves bristling behind the window during chemistry class

there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.

idk

okay this is interesting because pedagogies we have rn are not proper models

amazing hopefully this was all legible and frankly i might be going very off board but you seemed interesting

or never left

mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation

a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it