its performative

Style

This is a website run by a narcissist who can't produce anything without the hope that it is seen and loved but can't act due to the fear of it being seen and hated. They immediately feel the need to ask Jack GPT to define whatever this feeling is in the hope that understanding it will mean control over it and control over it will mean that they can stop it.

a heavy, heavy rain. a clear day.

I created this site

It Will Get Lighter

Wed, 11 Nov 2025 21:12:41

so i or you can author smaller fragments that get arranged

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.

Can I see

Garden Post-Dusk, Birds Above, In Another Life

Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17

something religious, a kind of complex,

it will get lighter

yes

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

"I'm only attracted to you", he replies. "Like, you only."

I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.

Thank you, Jack

yeah

mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation

we need to be deconstructing our identities

was it worth it

okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate