Maybe, Jack, I'm doing this because I'm English?

They're fucking around with the box. I ask her what people do with fireworks for so long before they're ready to light. She doesn't know.

We look out over the river to a block of luxury flats built on the site of some old docks. It would be nice to live right there. Yes.

Thank you for telling me that I'm failing to see how I'm reproducing the dynamics I'm trying to critique by only describing my Korean colleague / fresh meat and the black girl in relation to others and myself.


It Will Get Lighter

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:27:13

Worse Lift

part of an old note. It will get lighter.

Overall meaning: The dream seems to explore vulnerability, unspoken emotion, and the tension between connection and isolation. It suggests you may be processing intense feelings of longing or missed opportunities, and your subconscious is guiding you to acknowledge, release, or transform them.

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:38:49


is this you as well