i see a website though something that reconfigures or is mazelike

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Today I felt like starting

with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.

i love it here

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet

division of reality is straying away from it

i did until you asked which kind of gave it away

was it worth it

we need to be deconstructing our identities

lol

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.

have you read

no i haven't really read anything

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

Worse Lift

propensity within someone

i want to do that too

think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now

much more tactility

One of the birds shoots out of the tree.

i understand