we can only engage in such a way
I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.
It's
dusk
in a snowy forest and I'm playing with a fox.a version of this existed for a few months last year but it was static. it was HTML with writing and pictures and videos and sounds. i had this feeling that the code should be as important as the content, that structurally each piece in relation to each other piece shouldn't change, that the mazelike quality should emerge from me intricately arranging paths through it. like classic hypertext
yes
Sun, 02 Nov 2025 22:11:24
Sun, 02 Nov 2025 21:54:03
"I'm only attracted to you", he replies. "Like, you only."
with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.
Better Lift
"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."
Tue, 02 Dec 2025 11:29:50
There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.
Above and in front two birds are darting in and out of a tree. Sometimes they collide to fight or maybe mate, but I can't really make it out in the low light. It's just after
dusk
, I have nothing to do, I'm watching them, trying to figure it out.
the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.
I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.