It Will Get Lighter

i was tempted to lie about my name

i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything

idk

we can only engage in such a way

my watchlater reached its limit years ago and now i have to create a playlist for each new topic im interested in but it is incredibly hard to create the taxonomy of knowledge because everything seems to be everything else because at the end it is what you get from it that matters not what is given

i have read not even 1 book

so an active mazelike process

division of reality is straying away from it

think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now

so at the end

feel you

i love it here

They're fucking around with the box. I ask her what people do with fireworks for so long before they're ready to light. She doesn't know.

this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet

He went in there with a camera to film it before he moved out of the building. He didn't think anyone would believe the story if he didn't have proof.

1. Lift and confinement – The crowded, immovable lift represents feeling trapped or constrained in real life, either by social expectations, relationships, or internal emotions. The inability to speak in front of others suggests suppressed feelings or fear of judgment.
2. Unexpected confession – The girl saying “I think I might love you” could symbolize longing for connection or recognition. It may reflect unacknowledged desires, vulnerability, or anxiety about intimacy.
3. Forest and snow – The transition to a snowy forest signals escape into the subconscious, a place of solitude, reflection, and emotional processing. Snow often represents purity, stillness, or emotional coldness, while dusk points to transition or uncertainty.
4. The fox – Foxes are traditionally symbols of cunning, intuition, and guidance, but here it’s more ethereal: its bites are gentle yet noticeable, suggesting a confrontation with subtle truths, small regrets, or lessons that must be acknowledged. The unspoken apology indicates things left unresolved or feelings that cannot be expressed.
5. Death or dissolution – Dying in the dream often doesn’t mean literal death; it represents transformation, the end of a phase, or surrendering control. It can indicate letting go of fear, old habits, or emotional blockages.

We gather around the start of a causeway down to the Thames. It's a pretty cold night and there's a breeze coming off the river.

have you read

Overall meaning: The dream seems to explore vulnerability, unspoken emotion, and the tension between connection and isolation. It suggests you may be processing intense feelings of longing or missed opportunities, and your subconscious is guiding you to acknowledge, release, or transform them.

sorry i am texting like a slav

Thank you, Jack

I've found the girl, or she's found me, and we're smoking a cigarette while we watch the silhouettes of the French Raj and his fireworks bearer down on the bank.

its performative

so the method has to be autonomous

its good short few pages

amazing hopefully this was all legible and frankly i might be going very off board but you seemed interesting

you cannot feed someone truth

that looks like my instagram account