was it worth it

Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.

She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.

It Will Get Lighter

in a post. I want to be remembered

The bird dives back into the tree. It shakes, some leaves fall.


13, H, grate

I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 21:54:03

something religious, a kind of complex, it will get lighter, something washing, cleansing, revealing, etc.

Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?

Imprint, memory, impact, representation, impression

there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.

Tue, 02 Dec 2025 11:29:50

The slug lives in my bathroom. I only see it in the early hours of the morning, when I'm not quite right.


no longer writing in the third person