Better Lift

something religious, a kind of complex,

it will get lighter

1. Lift and confinement – The crowded, immovable lift represents feeling trapped or constrained in real life, either by social expectations, relationships, or internal emotions. The inability to speak in front of others suggests suppressed feelings or fear of judgment.
2. Unexpected confession – The girl saying “I think I might love you” could symbolize longing for connection or recognition. It may reflect unacknowledged desires, vulnerability, or anxiety about intimacy.
3. Forest and snow – The transition to a snowy forest signals escape into the subconscious, a place of solitude, reflection, and emotional processing. Snow often represents purity, stillness, or emotional coldness, while dusk points to transition or uncertainty.
4. The fox – Foxes are traditionally symbols of cunning, intuition, and guidance, but here it’s more ethereal: its bites are gentle yet noticeable, suggesting a confrontation with subtle truths, small regrets, or lessons that must be acknowledged. The unspoken apology indicates things left unresolved or feelings that cannot be expressed.
5. Death or dissolution – Dying in the dream often doesn’t mean literal death; it represents transformation, the end of a phase, or surrendering control. It can indicate letting go of fear, old habits, or emotional blockages.

what do you mean

like people can read 100 books and still not have the fire within them

in a way what we are really interested in with pedagogy is the magnetisation

magnetisation/form

you cannot feed someone language, they have to speak

the site i am dreaming

its performative

there is a distinction between western-modern pedagogical systems that's like text-based as in a legal method but there is an idea of "pathshala" or "guru shissho"/ "porompora" i mean how masters relayed knowledge to the student by (oral) transmission often by memorising books. so what was taught was always interactive. knowledge was interactive, you spoke with people rather than read texts.

division of reality is straying away from it

is everyoneback on tumblr now

December 2025

...

i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything

and the fake qualifier

your feed looks like my tumblr

theres a kind of a cowardice to generative art that i want to avoid though. i want the kind of relationship to this thing that a game designer has to a game engine

so an active mazelike process

i sat down to eat my peasant dinner but i thought it was a song you sent so i didn’t watch it then

a heavy, heavy rain. a clear day.

I created this site

ahnaf is it worth reading all those books

way too random but already engaging. i want to explore it

i guess imagine a multimedia obsidian or notion that behaves according to some insane arcane rules that you can't ever really determine