feel you

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.

a heavy, heavy rain. a clear day.

I created this site

.

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 21:54:03

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 21:22:59

Lift Analysis

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Thank you, Jack

autonomy of learning

a version of this existed for a few months last year but it was static. it was HTML with writing and pictures and videos and sounds. i had this feeling that the code should be as important as the content, that structurally each piece in relation to each other piece shouldn't change, that the mazelike quality should emerge from me intricately arranging paths through it. like classic hypertext

you cannot feed someone truth

propensity within someone

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46

I wonder if the birds knew I was watching?

so at the end

After thinking and forgetting and thinking and forgetting

which magnetises chains of pins

as in

its good

in a way what we are really interested in with pedagogy is the magnetisation

with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.