There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

I imagine that some lab-grown 29-year-old from Woking with a mind honed to identify individuals who fit the profile of Real Londoner (as conceived of by 50 opinion-polled racist builders and their wives in the Midlands) picks a stubborn local who can still somehow afford to live here and passes him along to some creative studio.

there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.

"No, it'll get cold!"
"Put a tut ahh put a-"

My inability to confront the old racist failed actor is distracting me. I decide not to tell her about it.

Tue, 02 Dec 2025 11:29:50

god being the centre magnet

we need to be deconstructing our identities

like magnets

Thank you for telling me that I'm failing to see how I'm reproducing the dynamics I'm trying to critique by only describing my Korean colleague / fresh meat and the black girl in relation to others and myself.

this will be about a slug

fw

its good

barren land

Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?

i dont understand magnetisation

magnetisation/form

think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now

or never left

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46

I'm getting bored and he can tell, so he shifts the topic towards me. He tells me he'd spotted me chatting to a girl earlier, a black girl, and asks what I thought of her, if I liked her. I mimed affirmatively.