it holds me to something (you, now). I love editing!

nope. i only remember the leaves bristling behind the window during chemistry class

way too random but already engaging. i want to explore it

ahnaf abrar

i sat down to eat my peasant dinner but i thought it was a song you sent so i didn’t watch it then

so magnetisation means the divine spirit acting thru u endowing you with its qualities

god being the centre magnet

And thank you for telling me that the manner in which the narrator consistently fails to act morally is really compelling. Fuck you.

Better Lift

Thank you, Jack

yes

was it worth it

I Write Goodbye Letter

He was a proper old-fashioned London geezer (cringe word, hate it, can't think of a better one, worst of all it's the correct word), kind of East Endy, kind of Real London, the kind you don't really meet but if you do it always feels like an uncanny immersive theatre experience. They're anachronistic. They only belong in the London collectively imagined by people who don't spend any time in it.

The Hatton geezer (fuck off) reminds me of this old failed actor who I'd met at a party a few years ago, another man out of time and out of place. This actor had scored a minor role in Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels and never really let go of it, had gone on to build his whole identity around it. I can't really blame him.

yeah people dont get it they assume its ahnaf

i hadn't considered this pedagogically or as a kind of personal knowledge management system (puke) at all but i suppose it is both of those things

send link

It's loud and he's gone deaf in one ear, so I don't think he's really hearing anything I'm trying to say. We're both pretty drunk too. It's making for a kind of surreal interactive Business Insider YouTube video of a conversation. He talks, waits for my response, sees my mouth moving but doesn't hear my words, then he imagines something in their place, and replies to that. At least I don't really have to do anything but drink and mime and listen to a lot of bullshit fake gangster talk, being an actor, boxing, the old days, blah blah blah.

not so on: yvf(wthw)

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

i was tempted to lie about my name

like first name

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46