with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.

I am below everything.

yes

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

Better Lift

Windrush Art Kid Oligarch

It's

dusk

One of the birds shoots out of the tree.

"No, it'll get cold!"
"Put a tut ahh put a-"

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.

ahnaf abrar

December 2025

isaac newton

i love it here

think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now

i dont understand magnetisation

i hadn't considered this pedagogically or as a kind of personal knowledge management system (puke) at all but i suppose it is both of those things

i see a website

ion

i don't really want to be associated with that one for some reason

so at the end