the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.
Sun, 02 Nov 2025 22:11:24
She closes the window. I wasn't paying attention anyway, I'm getting cold, and the birds are nowhere to be seen. I go inside.
there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.
"I'm only attracted to you", he replies. "Like, you only."
Wed, 11 Nov 2025 21:12:41
"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."
Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17
Thu, 06 Nov 2025 21:22:59
I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.
no longer writing in the third person
I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.
Thu, 04 Dec 2025 11:31:03
it is hopeful