yeah
the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.
She closes the window. I wasn't paying attention anyway, I'm getting cold, and the birds are nowhere to be seen. I go inside.
in a post. I want to be remembered
Thu, 04 Dec 2025 11:31:03
There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.
something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever
This is a website run by a narcissist who can't produce anything without the hope that it is seen and loved but can't act due to the fear of it being seen and hated. They immediately feel the need to ask Jack GPT to define whatever this feeling is in the hope that understanding it will mean control over it and control over it will mean that they can stop it.
The bird dives back into the tree. It shakes, some leaves fall.
I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.
I wonder if the birds knew I was watching?
Better Lift
with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.
hiding from the rain
i love it here
there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.
what do you mean
okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate