I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.

December 2025

It Will Get Lighter

Like the tide, it comes in and it washes over the beach. It's beautiful. But like the tide it goes out, sometimes it goes out further than it ever has, it recedes back across the beach and further out beyond the horizon. The bare seabed opens up in front of you and all you can do is look at it.

...

The slug lives in my bathroom. I only see it in the early hours of the morning, when I'm not quite right.

was it worth it

Slug

the site i am dreaming

I Write Goodbye Letter

way too random but already engaging. i want to explore it

  1. Lift and confinement – The crowded, immovable lift represents feeling trapped or constrained in real life, either by social expectations, relationships, or internal emotions. The inability to speak in front of others suggests suppressed feelings or fear of judgment.
  2. Unexpected confession – The girl saying “I think I might love you” could symbolize longing for connection or recognition. It may reflect unacknowledged desires, vulnerability, or anxiety about intimacy.
  3. Forest and snow – The transition to a snowy forest signals escape into the subconscious, a place of solitude, reflection, and emotional processing. Snow often represents purity, stillness, or emotional coldness, while dusk points to transition or uncertainty.
  4. The fox – Foxes are traditionally symbols of cunning, intuition, and guidance, but here it’s more ethereal: its bites are gentle yet noticeable, suggesting a confrontation with subtle truths, small regrets, or lessons that must be acknowledged. The unspoken apology indicates things left unresolved or feelings that cannot be expressed.
  5. Death or dissolution – Dying in the dream often doesn’t mean literal death; it represents transformation, the end of a phase, or surrendering control. It can indicate letting go of fear, old habits, or emotional blockages.

god "possessing" artists "possessing" people

yeah people dont get it they assume its ahnaf

i was tempted to lie about my name

Thank you, Jack

and so on. not wanting the rhyming / clanging

no like which do people call me

plato

...

we need to be deconstructing our identities

much more tactility

yeah

is this you as well

ahnaf is it worth reading all those books

its good

i hadn't considered this pedagogically or as a kind of personal knowledge management system (puke) at all but i suppose it is both of those things

yeah

so at the end

this will be about a slug

i sat down to eat my peasant dinner but i thought it was a song you sent so i didn’t watch it then

fw