...

no longer writing in the third person

with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.

Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.

Rain, starting


i believe search always should be immersive, because whatever is pre planned and non consuming (what you are looking for is total engulfment by the spectre of the real), a joyous intensity, a flow of virtue

"No, it'll get cold!"
"Put a tut ahh put a-"

I wonder if the birds knew I was watching?


i love to walk around and see things and take photos and go online and look at websites and click on links and take screenshots i love to surf and i love to browse

a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it

that looks like my instagram account

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now

we want to live the knowledge too live the content

i know a little bit of lacan which probably influences me in a way i cant articulate

so at the end

so an active mazelike process

i am quite illiterate on producing technology


Overall meaning: The dream seems to explore vulnerability, unspoken emotion, and the tension between connection and isolation. It suggests you may be processing intense feelings of longing or missed opportunities, and your subconscious is guiding you to acknowledge, release, or transform them.

I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

much more tactility