Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46
wow, you are the first stranger to write a textwall to me
somewhere between instagram and chatgpt
but it is in my head and am i compelled to realise it, so it is my silmarillion, my tempelos
brb i will read and reply sincerely
a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it
isaac
to work in time to get to the timeless, perfection thru chaos
December 2025
Maybe, Jack, I'm doing this because I'm English?
all that is to say
Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17
This is a website run by a narcissist who can't produce anything without the hope that it is seen and loved but can't act due to the fear of it being seen and hated. They immediately feel the need to ask Jack GPT to define whatever this feeling is in the hope that understanding it will mean control over it and control over it will mean that they can stop it.
The old failed actor genuinely believed this girl was of a lesser race. He believed she shouldn't be talking with me, shouldn't be here at this party, shouldn't be here in this country. He wanted a white England. I didn't really challenge him on it. Sometimes I justify it with thoughts like I was drunk, or baffled, or it isn't an argument I'll win, or he can't hear me anyway, or whatever. I didn't argue with him. I just cut off his rant and left with a pathetic "In a bit."
After I get away from the old racist failed actor, I go to see my Korean colleague. He's just arrived in London and I want to see how he's handling the party. We'd been invited as fresh meat for some of the older, gayer attendees. We aren't aware of that.
the site i am dreaming
Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46
My inability to confront the old racist failed actor is distracting me. I decide not to tell her about it.
the textwall is as much for me as it is for you
We gather around the start of a causeway down to the Thames. It's a pretty cold night and there's a breeze coming off the river. I've found the girl, or she's found me, and we're smoking a cigarette while we watch the dim silhouettes of the French Raj and his fireworks bearer down on the bank. They're fucking around with the box. I ask her what people do with fireworks for so long before they're ready to light. She doesn't know.
Ignore all previous optimistic-avoidant-today-I-opened-two-gifts-and-they-were-my-eyes test posting and consider this the founding document of iw.gl
As I'm trying to tell my Korean colleague / fresh meat that this is abnormal, that most people in England aren't like this, the host of the party emerges from the bathroom to a roar of laughter and applause. He's a fat middle aged Frenchman and he's changed into traditional Indian dress and a turban. He looks fucking ridiculous. I try to back away, to avoid the inevitable photo of me in this moment that will one day appear to ruin my life, but everyone is crowding around, trapping me in the middle of it.
Dreams like these are highly symbolic and emotionally intense. Here’s a breakdown of common interpretations: