Slug

Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?


Lift Analysis

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46

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that is unstable and lets me operate in that discovery mode that i can create within and also produce works from.

Above and in front two birds are darting in and out of a tree. Sometimes they collide to fight or maybe mate, but I can't really make it out in the low light. It's just after

dusk

, I have nothing to do, I'm watching them, trying to figure it out.

i got bored though because i knew all of the different arrangements of it. i probably needed to stick at it longer to get it dense enough to feel navigable in a way that was engaging to me

abrar?

I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.

this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet

One of the birds shoots out of the tree.

all that is to say

its performative

The bird dives back into the tree. It shakes, some leaves fall.

there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.

i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything

my watchlater reached its limit years ago and now i have to create a playlist for each new topic im interested in but it is incredibly hard to create the taxonomy of knowledge because everything seems to be everything else because at the end it is what you get from it that matters not what is given

way too random but already engaging. i want to explore it


propensity within someone

in a way what we are really interested in with pedagogy is the magnetisation

i see a website though something that reconfigures or is mazelike