My inability to confront the old racist failed actor is distracting me. I decide not to tell her about it.

Better Lift

something religious, a kind of complex,

it will get lighter

, something washing, cleansing, revealing, etc.

no longer writing in the third person

She closes the window. I wasn't paying attention anyway, I'm getting cold, and the birds are nowhere to be seen. I go inside.

Picture

13, H, grate

Garden Post-Dusk, Birds Above, In Another Life

this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet

This is a website run by a narcissist who can't produce anything without the hope that it is seen and loved but can't act due to the fear of it being seen and hated. They immediately feel the need to ask Jack GPT to define whatever this feeling is in the hope that understanding it will mean control over it and control over it will mean that they can stop it.

i see a website though something that reconfigures or is mazelike

wow, you are the first stranger to write a textwall to me

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 22:11:24

Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?

but i respect your search

She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.

Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17

i am quite confused, not quite getting the idea of it

I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.

It's

dusk

in a snowy forest and I'm playing with a fox.
It bites my wrist but there is only a dull ache.
I feel that it wants to say sorry but can't. I die.

so at the end

we can only engage in such a way

I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.

division of reality is straying away from it