After thinking and forgetting and thinking and forgetting

Slug

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.

I am below everything.

a heavy, heavy rain. a clear day.

I created this site

Thu, 04 Dec 2025 11:31:03

something religious, a kind of complex,

it will get lighter

One of the birds shoots out of the tree.

13, H, grate

Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?

The bird dives back into the tree. It shakes, some leaves fall.

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 21:54:03

think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now

i believe search always should be immersive, because whatever is pre planned and non consuming (what you are looking for is total engulfment by the spectre of the real), a joyous intensity, a flow of virtue

so an active mazelike process

autonomy of learning

so at the end

its good

division of reality is straying away from it

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:27:13